Lugie's (abbreviated) List - 12/7

Short on time...but a few things from the weekend:

1. Where was Jesus on Saturday Timmy? Alabama-Texas National Championship makes sense (begrudgingly), but how the hell did Florida not get matched up against TCU? I'm sure it is based on region and I'm missing something - but even though Cincinnati is undefeated most would argue TCU was the next best team behind the big 3. Not to mention, that matchup is a ton sexier than FLA-Cinci (Gators are 10 point favorites). And while TCU-Boise St. will be a fun game, matching up the two non-BCS conference teams together just seems like a cop out for the BCS not to stir up controversy.

2. The Redskins never cease to amaze me. Just when they start to surprise you, they show you what true crapiness is really about. They missed field goal to seal the game, followed by a Brees bomb and OT win by the Saints. I'm just happy I wrote the Skins off weeks ago so I really didn't give a crap. Better draft pick for us to screw up in April!

3. This is going to sound a tad crazy, but has Bill Belichick developed some Andy Reid tendencies? Three times now the Patriots have lost games they've been up 10 or more points. Seemingly in control Sunday, the Patriots conservatively gave back the game to the Dolphins...calling a run on 3rd and 6 only up 2 pts. Maybe it is just arrogance? I don't get the plan at all because there seemed to be no urgency in the 2nd half from the Patriots on Sunday given their defensive woes in recent weeks.

4. Colts-Saints 18-0 Super Bowl? I can only imagine the collective BAC of the 1972 Dolphins and Tom Brady watching that one.

5. Still one episode to go, but I think this has to be Dexter's best season. All thanks to an amazing performance by John Lithgow as this season's villain. If he doesn't win an Emmy for this role it will rank #2 on all-time Emmy-screws behind The Wire never receiving a single Emmy (that just blew my mind when I heard it). Sunday Night TV: Dexter A+, Californication B+

Lugie's List 11/30 - Lugie Doin' Work

"Kobe Doin' Work" is out on DVD everyone! I went to Best Buy at 5 am on Black Friday to get my copy before it sold out!


Now to the NFL...

1. Young v. Leinart Part Deux. Holy Cow! I’m going to guess Leinart had Nam-like flashbacks to the 2006 BCS national championship in his sleep last night. 99-yard drives to win the game on the last play don’t happen every day. With Vince Young at the helm, the Titans have erased a 0-6 start with 5 straight wins. Everyone is talking about the playoffs for the Titans, but I just don’t see them running the table, which is really their only shot. Mainly because…

2. They have a big showdown with the 11-0 Colts next week. And maybe the readers out there are getting sick of reading about it in this column, BUT PEYTON MANNING IS GOOD AT FOOTBALL. I can’t stress that enough people. The Colts came back yet again to remain perfect.

3. Highly entertaining Sunday night game with the Ravens winning in OT behind a clutch INT from their defense. I know he threw the game losing INT, but Dennis Dixon will be a player in the NFL. Most people don’t know who this guy is because of an ACL tear at Oregon that took him out of the Heisman race, but I’d be shocked if he wasn’t a solid NFL QB for someone down the road.

4. I was going to complain here about how sick I am of watching the Lions play on Thanksgiving Day and then I read this…

5. The Silverdome, former home to the Detroit Lions, sold at auction for $583,000 (it cost $56 million to build three decades ago). To reiterate, a former professional sports stadium went for literally less than a one bedroom apartment in New York City. I’m now firmly in the “OK Detroit has enough problems let’s not pull the Thanksgiving Day NFL game from them” corner.

6. The fact that TCU will not even get to sniff the BCS national championship is a travesty. College Football year-after-year disappoints the casual fan who wants drama, interesting matchups and most importantly, A CLEAR CHAMPION. We currently have 6 undefeated teams (although Florida-Alabama in the SEC championship game will change that for sure). The fact that the championship game is all but decided (FLA-ALA winner vs. Texas, who shouldn’t get upset by Nebraska) just really pisses me off. Hey Obama - screw healthcare - I voted for you to get out there and make a NCAA football playoff happen. My re-election vote depends on it.

7. Up until Friday, I never subscribed to the phrase “Show me a hot girl, and I’ll show you a guy tired of f-ing her.” Then I heard speculation that Tiger Woods cheated on this wife [pictured here] spurring his bizarre car accident early Friday morning. Now I understand the meaning of that phrase.

8. And now for my serious take on the topic. What amazes me up until this point in Tiger’s career is we know very, very, very little about him off the golf course. Think about how many athletes/celebs have embarrassing videos and pictures out there. Tiger has done a great job of keeping the public and media at arm’s length when it comes to his personal life. Given this, I still don’t know what to make of Tiger's vague apology/statement and refusal to speak to authorities. Maybe he is just hoping this goes away, but people don’t just casually pull out of their driveway and hit a fire hydrant and tree. The laws of common sense tell us something else was going on here. I’m very worried about how this is going to play out publically given Tiger is taking the “if I don’t say anything of meaning maybe all these people will stop talking about it” defense. To be continued.

8. Took a rare trip to the movies Sunday to see “The Blind Side”, the story about Ravens Tackle Michael Oher’s journey from the streets to the NFL. Very entertaining movie and I highly recommend it to everyone. I did not not tear up during it. And I swore to myself I’d never EVER say anything nice about the acting abilities of Keanu Reeves or Sandra Bullock, but wow, she is actually good in this movie? You are probably asking why I ended that last sentence with a question mark…I know…I’m scared too.

9. Since no Gamblers Anonymous this week: Saints -1 vs. Patriots – Heavy money has gone on the Patriots and I’m not sure why. The Saints have shown their defense is way better than the Colts and the Super Dome is 1000x louder than Lucas Oil Field. I have a tough time seeing the Saints losing this game, but I wouldn’t give up more than a point. You don’t want to get screwed on a Saints 1-3 point win.

10. Sunday Night TV Ratings: Dexter A+ (I think everyone finished last night’s episode in a cold sweat); Californication B

Turkeys of the Year: Dan Snyder

[insert long blog post about being the worst owner in all of professional sports here]

That's right...worse than this guy! [DISCLAIMER: IF YOU HAVE ANY CHILDREN NEAR BY PLEASE SHIELD THEIR EYES]
OK, maybe not worse than this guy...but pretty f'ing bad!

Turkeys of the Year: Boston Red Sox

Not a good year to be a Red Sox fan.

• Your owner preseason publicly cried about the Yankees signing Teixeira to a big contract, despite offering Teixeira a gigantic contract himself. Nothing hypocritical about that.
• The two corner stones of your championships are now heavily suspected to have used performance enhancing drugs in recent years (Manny suspended this year, and both rumored to be on the 2003 PED list).
• Remember when you had the deepest rotation in the league? How many of those guys even survived the season in your rotation or on your team?
• Oh, and the Yankees just won their 27th World Series title.
  

-Steve Lugerner

Turkeys of the Year: Gilbert Arenas

Agent zero...accomplishments: one playoff series win in his career. The way this guy talks about his own ability you would think he has multiple rings by now. He's had three knee surgeries in the last two year. Even I wouldn't blame a player for being that unlucky - oh wait, until he blamed his own team this offseason for 'wanting to sell tickets' and letting him rush back. Maybe take some responsibility for your own actions Gil? Finally, he got his $111 million dollar contract essentially tying the Wizards to an unstable personality for the next 4+ seasons.

Here is an excerpt from a recent Washington Post article discussing the rift in the Wizards locker room:

The last time [Arenas] played almost a full season, in 2006-07, Arenas was able to carry the Wizards out of a 4-9 hole and to the best record in the Eastern Conference by late January. "I'm sitting here thinking, 'Do I have to go into attack mode like I was [three] years ago to get us over the hump?' " he said. "I hope not. It's only so many nights, so many games before I'm going to have to start doing what I do."
The question is whether Arenas is still capable of such heroics while he struggles to regain the form that made him a three-time all-star after a hiatus of almost two seasons because of a bothersome left knee. Arenas said he is the only player on the team who has had to sacrifice his game, but he has been the leading scorer in eight of the 12 games, has taken 64 more shots than anyone on the team, and is shooting just 39 percent. He also leads the league in turnovers per game (4.0).

The man is honestly delusional and I’ll be the first to admit I let it slide for years because at least back in the day he could put up 50 on back to back nights and single-handedly win games. After watching him commit 6 more turnovers last night, I can't help but wonder if Gilbert can even play the point position the way we NEED him to. Honestly, I think Gilbert's basketball IQ is so much lower than anyone recognizes. He leads the league in turnovers...so this notion he can be a "pass first point guard" and be as good as the top PGs in the league is just wrong. He doesn't have the decision making ability.

I can't speak for how the other players in the locker room feel, but I can't help but wonder if some of the veterans are tired of Gilbert pretending he's a top 5 player in the league and his annoying ego song and dance with the media. His game is clearly hurting the team right now more than helping and until he just shuts his mouth and recognizes that, we are screwed!

-Steve Lugerner

Turkeys of the Year: Knicks and Nets

Going to be posting the biggest Turkeys in sports today.

Easy one to start with: Fans/Management of the New York Knicks and New Jersey Nets.

The most pathetic part about the management of both these teams is they think they have any chance of luring Lebron James or even Dwayne Wade to New York. I'm sure Lebron is just dying to play on a team with Chris Duhon running the point (who’s shooting percentage is comparable to Michael J. Fox at a gun range) and Eddie Curry now back at center after losing a teenage-eating-disorder amount of weight. He’s like the guy on the cigarette commercials who literally has half a face.

And the 0-14 Nets? I'm sure Lebron would love to team up with the Chairman Yi and Rafer ‘skip-to-my-lou’ Alston over the Cavs roster. The Nets are as far from a championship caliber supporting cast as ANY team in the league.

I guess in this day and age in the NBA when your team can't draft or do anything right, you have to pray for a free agent year like 2010, and sacrifice an entire season to have cap room. If I was a fan of either team, I'd be furious about my team rolling out such a pathetic roster for 82 games at the slim hopes of attracting a superstar. Who in their right mind would pay for season tickets for these two teams coming into the season?

-Steve Lugerner

Lugie's List 11/23 - Gobble Gobble

A moment of silence for my survivor season, which after lasting 10 weeks (beating my previous record of 2 weeks) is disappointing. How the Bengals can lose to Oakland after beating Pittsburg last week is beyond me…which leads me to…

1. By my count there are only 5 good NFL teams (Pittsburg and the Bengals fall out this week…even losing on the road is unacceptable when it's KC and Oakland):

2. San Diego – Norv Turner is still the coach. I refuse to even consider them contenders until a coaching change is made. Having said that…they’ve won 5 straight and have a shot at a first round bye.

3. Minnesota – They are cruising to a first round bye and look solid on both sides of the ball. Having said that…they haven’t beaten anyone on the contender list and Brett Favre is their QB – ticking time bomb come playoff time.

4. New Orleans – After a few close calls in recent weeks, the dominant Saints returned against Tampa, and at 10-0 stand a fairly good shot to finish undefeated in the regular season. Having said that…they have a showdown with the Patriots next Monday night which will be their toughest game of the year and hopefully Colts-Pats 2.0 for the viewing public.

5. Patriots – Belichick stuck it to the Jets yet again Sunday (does Rex Ryan have to give back his Coach of the Year trophy he received after week 3?). Having said that…Bill Belichick is a preening shmo who steals the souls of 5 children before every game to inspire his evil coaching.

6. Colts – The Colts looked shaky again Sunday barely holding on to remain undefeated. Having said that...they have Peyton FREAKIN' MANNING.

So I shamelessly stole a joke from Curb to fill my column. Having said that...you read it anyways. (ok moving on...)

7. Was the Bears-Eagles game as awful /boring to watch on TV as it was to Gamecast on my phone in the car ride home? Andy Reid again attempted to lose the game for the Eagles by running on 3rd and 4 where a first down nets them a W. There isn't a coach in the league that is worse at calling plays on the downs that matter most.

8. I've started reading the SportsGuy's new book on basketball/NBA, and 30 pages in, I will admit, I'm loving it. Which brings me to my stance on the SportsGuy I've held for years: nobody writes better about the NBA than him. It was honestly his incessant Boston love that became too much for a Boston-hater like myself. Heck, I didn't even hate the Celtics up until the 50th straight article about why Big Papi was the most feared hitter of the last 50 years or why Tom Brady is the best QB of all-time. Maybe those columns don't exist exactly, but you get the point.

9. Things I'm thankful for (and for purposes of comedy I'm not going to mention the obvious ones, so family...friends...take a hike): sugar-free Red Bull, Sarges, #27, The Fresh Prince of Bel Air re-runs, legalized gambling, illegal gambling, Maury Povich and Baked Lays (I'd be 50 pounds heavier without Baked Lays...no question in my mind).

10. Sunday Night TV Ratings: Dexter A+; Curb A; Mocha Joe A+; Californication B+

Gamblers Anonymous: Top 5 Casinos and Week 11 in the NFL

It’s been a long time coming, but I’m finally ready to release my top 5 casinos. Unlike 6-10, these 5 really have no glaring flaws. All 5 are located in Vegas, their décor is top notch and the accommodations are the best in the world. There is really no glaring weakness from any of these so rather than nit-pick over which has nicer throw pillows on the bed, here are some stories to accompany my top 5 casinos:

Bellagio (Strengths: reputation, poker room, any restaurant) – ‘I’ll go to War with a 5’
In my gambling heyday I was able to show Kobe-like coolness at a casino table. No matter the size of the bet, I wouldn’t freak out. This trademark calmness was on display one Bellagio evening at a Casino War table. Forget blackjack – how about just one card, you and the dealer, high card. In a calculated (idiotic) move I threw down $400 on one hand. With a crowd of friends watching, I pulled what seemed like a death sentence card: the 5 of spades. That’s when I casually turned to the crowd, shrugged my shoulders and infamously said, “I’ll go to war with a 5!” Sure enough the dealer pulled a 2 and the crowd went wild.

Mandalay Bay (Strengths: Theme, place to eat at 5am) – Cheaters Kind of Prosper
I’ve only seen someone cheat in a casino once, and trust me when I say it wasn’t some type of Ocean's 11 magic. I was sitting with two buddies at a blackjack table when a strange looking guy sat in 3rd base next to me (the last seat at the table).

Friend 1: Uh, did you guys see that?
Both of us: No - what are you talking about?
Friend 1 (a few hands later in a quiet voice): Did you guys not see that? He just dropped another chip on his hand when the dealer wasn’t looking.

Sure enough, I watched the guy pull a 20 in his first two cards and while the dealer was attending to the first player's hand, he flicked a $25 chip in the air onto his other $25 chip and chuckled to himself. Not exactly the kids from MIT taking Vegas for millions. We watched him successfully complete this anti-stealth move 5 more times with each time Friend 1 who going “HE JUST DID IT AGAIN” under his breath as all three of us were starting to lose it with laughter. Finally, the dealer caught him and called over the pit boss, who told the strange guy he would spend the night in jail if he did it again. What the hell happened to Vegas? I was really hoping someone would take a sledge hammer to his knee. I know Shelly Kaplow wouldn’t have tolerated that kind of crap in his casino (no…nothing?…The Cooler is the reference we were looking for here).

Caesars Palace (Strengths: Sports book, Pool, Palace Shops, food court) – The Suicide Bet
A suicide bet is exactly what it sounds like. It’s when you get so fed up with black jack that you go all in with the remainder of your chips. A standard suicide bet is roughly 5-10x (or more) higher than your average bet. It is made on sheer frustration and nuttiness. One night at Caesars Palace, my friend Ari had had enough. He was holding roughly $200 in chips and put it down on a hand of black jack. Winner. Put it all on again. Winner. Double the fun again. Winner. Double it up! Winner (at this point he began to pocket some of the money each time). He went on to win an amazing 11 hands in row, turning his $200 into roughly $3,000 in under 15 minutes (and the 12th hand he lost he had $1,500 on the table). I do not recommend this type of gambling to my readers. Not good for the heart.

Venetian (Strengths: Poker room, Grand Canal shops, Tao) – ‘Pay to Play’
This is not my story, but always thought it was funny. Two friends checking in at the front desk:
“Ok guys you are going to go through this row of slots here to get to the elevator bank for the Ivory Tower. The bar by the craps tables plays live music 9-2, the box office is back down to your right if you are interested in show tickets, and the bar over here behind the row of tables is also open late, but, you have to pay to play at that bar if you know what I mean.”

Which brings me to my biggest beef with the city of Las Vegas. In my 15 visits, I have never been propositioned for sex by a prostitute. I’ve been visible drunk and had wads of cash virtually spewing out of my wallet, and yet it has never even laughable come up with someone. To back track for just one second - I don’t want there to be any confusion here. I’m not looking to pay a prostitute in Vegas and if I ever run for political office, this paragraph alone can be taken out of context and sink my chances. I'm just saying, it would just be nice to be noticed one-time by a hooker. Am I not pretty enough? Do you know what this has done for my self-esteem? (hoping this far into the column girlfriend has stopped reading this…if not, heyyyyyyyyyy)

Wynn/Encore (Strengths: Wynn Deli, Pool, Sports Book) – Darth Vader
I think Bill Simmons has written about his refusal to play black jack against the auto-shuffler ad nauseam (25 columns to be exact, right behind his #1 topic the 1986 Celtics at 547 columns). I decided to tackle the beast with KJ and Ari. As we sat there getting slaughtered by Darth, we made vomit noises on bad beats, physically banged our head on the table and hummed the Darth Vader theme over and over again. Oh, did I mention this was all before 1 p.m. in the middle of the week? The nice woman dealer working the day shift who was roughly the age of all our mothers was shaking her head in disgust. “What is wrong with you guys..what would all of your mothers think?” I am pretty sure she relocated her family out of Vegas after this classic display of degenerate behavior.

P.S. If it was socially acceptable to write several paragraphs - scratch that - an entire column about the Matzo Bowl Soup at the Wynn Deli I would. Just know that.

Let’s get to this week’s NFL picks:
Peyton FREAKIN’ Manning: Colts -1.5 at Ravens – The last time Peyton played in Baltimore it was 35-0 by the middle of the third quarter and some dude named Sorgi was trotting on the field. This Ravens team is not that bad, but I can’t for the life of me figure out how the Colts are not -3 or more. And when have you ever known me not to bet the Colts.

Jay Cutler is the anti-Peyton: Eagles -3 at Chicago - He stinks. Plain and simple - he is not any good Happy! This is a miserable Sunday night game - watch the Curb finale twice instead and check the score after.

MNF: Titans +4.5 at Texans – I don’t do analysis on two teams and a game I don’t care about. Listen to a Simmons podcast for that.
-Steve Lugerner

Lugie's List: 11/16 - Belichick's Blunder

There was a lot of talk this week about Brady and Manning being the top two quarterbacks of all-time, in "some order," according to a Boston sports writer. Uh, not some order: Peyton Manning #1 and everyone else starts at #2 (and I’m not convinced Brady is #2). No QB today is anywhere close to Peyton’s level. He is literally the smartest man ever to step on the football field. Which leads us into the game of the year in the NFL...

1. I know you have three rings Bill, BUT HOW DO YOU NOT PUNT? HOW DO YOU NOT PUNT? If you don't trust your defense to stop a team needing to go the length of the field to win, why even line up on Sunday? How can Bill Belichick look his defense in the eye after this game and say 'I have faith in you guys'? A friend brought up the argument that maybe he just trusts his offense that much. That still isn't a good reason to go for it in this situation. If you fail on 4th and 2 on your own 30 WITH THE LEAD, then you essentially guaranteed a Colts win (see Colts win 35-34). This is one of the worst coaching decisions I've ever seen. Additionally, the Pats carelessly burned timeouts and were unable to challenge the spot of the ball on the 4th down play, although I doubt there was enough evidence to overturn the spot. O/U of replays of ‘BELICHICK’S BLUNDER’ on the 6pm SportsCenter set at 7.5.

2. It goes without saying, but it has to be one of the greatest regular season games of all time. Best two teams in the NFL, best rivalry in the NFL, best two QBs, two amazing offenses and a riveting last 4 minutes of play. I'm still sweating bullets thinking about it. Oh and because I always try to remain objective…BOSTON SUCKS!

3. I know some BingBong loyalists complain Jerry Silverberg doesn’t post enough. Who knew how much work was required to manage a fake Mike Francesa twitter account. However, please re-read Silverberg's Jets article after they started 3-0 - couldn't have been more right. Ah, to be a Jets fan. One minute you are swimming on top the division - new coach, new QB, great defense - the next minute you've lost 5 of 6 and Rex Ryan is desperately trying to line up endorsements for NutriSystem. Is there another team in the NFL that consistently sucker punches their fan base every season by week 9? Really is an impressive feat.

4. The ‘MJD fantasy kneel heard ‘round the world’ during the last minute of the Jacksonville-Jets game was an incredible video game play that most head coaches or players would never think to do. Even though the Vegas line was unaffected by MJD taking a seat at the one yard line instead of scoring a TD, I can only imagine the fantasy emails circulated regarding .1-6 point loses by MJD owners. Ouch.

5. After watching Colts-Pats, the Saints struggling against the Rams, the Cowboys and Packers fornicating the football for a half and the Chargers beating the Eagles - is there any doubt the AFC is winning the Super Bowl? I’m not convinced the Saints would stand a chance against an experienced team like the Colts or Pats.

6. For as good as replay usually is in the NFL, we had two incidents Sunday where a play couldn't be reviewed. A) The Pats spot on 4th and 2 mentioned earlier because of no timeouts and the play coming before the two minutes warning, and B) the Packers being awarded a fumble recovery when it was clear a Cowboys player recovered the ball first and was touched down. Can someone explain to me why you can't challenge that play? That made no sense and while I doubt the Cowboys were coming back in that game, it was a pretty big gimme for the Packers.

7. What did the gambling community learn this week? By Week 9 the NFL is way too good at setting the lines. Everyone has been loading up on favorites week after week and it was only a matter of time before odds makers caught up.

8. And on a more personal level, someone learned this week never ever parlay EVERY BET with the same game (i.e. Alabama-Broncos, Wisconsin-Broncos, New York Liberty-Broncos, etc.). ESPECIALLY, don’t do this when the team you are loading up on is playing against your favorite team. This is the ultimate f-u to the gambling gods and could not be worse for your gambling karma. And yes, I'm referring to the Redskins shocking win against an overrated Broncos team. The Skins scored over 17 points for the first time since the Eisenhower administration and we had a 100-yard rusher with I believe Kenan Thompson filling in at left tackle. Hooray, we will be just good enough to pick outside of the top 5 on draft day yet again.

9. Full disclosure: I have never been a huge Curb fan. I’ve watched episodes in past seasons that were so annoying and unfunny I really disliked the show. This is the first full season I’ve really watched regularly, and by my count only one of those episodes fit this mold (Larry getting his doctor’s home number was painful). Getting to last night’s episode – it’s probably the best Curb episode I’ve ever watched. A must watch for any Seinfeld fan (even if you don’t watch Curb) and I’m sure the finale next week will bring more of the same. Absolutely hysterical.

10. Sunday Night TV Ratings: Bill Belichick: F-, Peyton Manning: A+, Dexter B, Curb A++, Californication A+ (another amazing episode…all shot in Hank’s apartment…brilliant).

-Steve Lugerner

Quick Picks: Week 10

There are three -- count 'em -- three good games this week.  What a season it's been.  Let's get to it...

Bengals @ Steelers

-The Steelers are gooood.  That's really all there is to it.  The Steelers D should be able to suppress CedBen.  Chris Henry is out for the year and Andre Caldwell isn't enough of a threat to steer coverage away from Ocho.  Although I think the Bengals defense should be able to keep them in the game, it's like Jon Gruden said on Monday Night Football:  the way the Steelers close out games is masterful.  Look for Mendenhall to grind down an exhausted defense in the 4th quarter.  Steelers roll on 23-17.

Eagles @ Chargers

-This is a tough one to gauge.  If the Eagles want to win this one, they're going to have to do something Andy Reid seems to have no interest in doing anymore -- running the football.  San Diego has one of the best pass defense's in the league, but are allowing 130 yards a game on the ground.  Brian Westbrook seems to be doing alright and should play on Sunday.  My advice to Coach Reid is to give the Chargers a healthy dose of Westbrook and McCoy early in the game so McNabb can sell the play-action later on to bomb it deep to DeSean and/or Maclin.  Another key to this game is going to be 3rd downs.  The Eagles have been amongst the worst in the league at converting on 3rd down this year and it's certainly hurt them.  The Chargers, on the other hand, are amongst the worst in the league at preventing 3rd down conversions.  Philip Rivers should look to LDT and Sproles for quick screens early on to make the Eagles hesitate on their blitzing schemes.  If they can do that, Rivers should have a field day with his weapons.  The Eagles secondary only has one starter taller than 5'10", (Sean Jones at 6'1"), and should have trouble matching up against 6'5" Vincent Jackson, 6'4" Antonio Gates, and 6'5" Malcolm Floyd.  Should be a good one.  I'm gonna give the Bolts the edge though.  Chargers win 28-24.

Patriots @ Colts

-I know the Ravens and Browns are the Monday Night game, but something tells me this is the actual "Game of the Week."  It's almost foolish to try to predict this one.  I'm throwing all the stats out the window because when these two teams play each other, none of that stuff matters.  Peyton gets rid of the ball so fast; the younger defenders on the Pats will have no idea where he's going with it and the veteran players will be too slow to get to it.  44 is the combined age of the Colts starting rookie cornerbacks and you know Randy Moss has gotta be licking his lips thinking about that.  The Colts can talk about the great job Melvin Bullitt's done filling in, but he's no Bob Sanders.  There's a very real chance that Brady can and will pick apart that secondary.  The best shot the Colts have is to keep constant pressure on the Tinman with Mathis and Freeney.  I'd certainly love to be wrong about this one because it kills me to say this.  The Pats win the aerial assault 38-31.

Here's two more quick freebies for you...

Cowboys @ Packers

-The Packers just aren't very good at football.  I can't wait to see what The Matador (Daryn Colledge) has in store for this week.  I say he only "Ole's!" himself into allowing Demarcus Ware to get four sacks.  The Packers defense could definitely stop Tony Romo, but that would involve a pass rush -- something else they don't have.  Woodson will shut down Roy Williams while Al Harrass gives up 350 yards to Kilometers Austin.  If you see me on Sunday, punch me in the face because I'd prefer that to watching this game.  (Note: If you actually see me on Sunday, please don't punch me in the face -- that's the meal-ticket.)  Cowboys win 45-(-6) -- don't worry, we'll find a way.

Bears @ 49ers

-I'm feeling a little clairvoyant today.  I keep getting these images in my head about this game.  I see Frank Gore having a big day -- maybe 104 rushing yards and a touchdown.  I see Matt Forte somehow running the ball worse than he usually does.  I think he'll have 20 carries for only 41 yards with no touchdowns.  Lastly, I see Jay Cutler...  Wow, do I see Jay Cutler.  I see four...no...FIVE interceptions!  The last one coming at a crucial point in the game, perhaps the last play of the game in the endzone??  I don't know.  These visions just seem so real and clear to me.  Call me Nostradamus, but I think the Niners win this one 10-6.


Boy, it always starts out short and just keeps getting longer -- (that's what she said, I know).  No Sleepers or Worries this week because the games are just that terrible.  I mean, what would you like me to say?  Yes, Chris Johnson is a good start against the Bills.  I think you'll be alright starting Brees against the Rams, but you might want to reconsider Jamal Lewis against the Ravens.  Enjoy Weak 10...

-Dave

PS - About that Forte picture, you'd be amazed what the internet can come up with when you search pictures for "Matt Forte Sucks."  Although I do realize it's inaccurate.  Surely he's still averaging 3.4 ypc, but the line about the one touchdown must have come before his big two-touchdown game against the Browns.

Noah Gold, Ladies and Gentlemen...

No idea if that's a great question because I don't watch enough nor know enough about college football.  I'm no BingBong historian, but I think this will go down as the shortest response to a Burner question in the site's illustrious history.

Don't vote for me this week.  That sucked. 

-Noah

Conspiracy indeed

Oh I think there's definitely some truth to this theory.  There's all sorts of evidence validating it too.  Some of the calls UF and Bama have gotten this year have been downright awful.  The freshest one in my mind is of course the interception that wasn't called in last week's LSU-Bama game.  To me it looked like the LSU player had his feet in bounds, (yes, I said "feet" even though I know college football only requires one foot to be in bounds...that's how bad of a call it was).  You can say the LSU player hadn't secured the ball when he had that first foot down if you'd like, but that's irrelevant in the grander scheme of this theory. 

There is also, of course, last week when Urban Meyer was fined $30,000 for making a relatively harmless comment about the officials possibly missing a late hit call on Tim Tebow against UGA -- a comment made on the Wednesday after the game took place, four days later.  You can argue that it is the job of the SEC to make sure coaches don't criticize the judgment of the officials, but it's just a little peculiar that in that same UF-UGA game Brandon Spikes was caught trying to gouge out the eye of UGA runningback Washaun Ealey and the SEC only suspended Spikes for half of his next game.  It just seems that with those two incidents the SEC really went out of their way to ensure no other coaches critique their referees while ensuring at the same time that UF doesn't go an entire game without their best defensive player.

The real shame of it is that I love the SEC.  I think it's a great football conference because of it's ultra-competitive nature and consistently strong programs, but if this is the lengths it's willing to go to to ensure a spot in the National Championship game then it really is a shame.  Although one could also argue that they are victims of a broken system, (the BCS in general), and that it's not entirely the SEC's fault.  One could also go a step further and say that the SEC conspiracy is merely hiding under the umbrella of a much larger BCS conspiracy.  You can't honestly tell me the BCS is licking their lips at the possibility of a Cincinnati-TCU championship game.

-Dave

Burner of the Week

"BingBong, what do you guys think about these talks of an SEC conspiracy that have been going around? About how the SEC is having the refs call games in favor of Alabama and Florida so they'll both be undefeated when they face each other in the SEC Championship game and pretty much guarantee a spot for one of them in the BCS Championship game." Les M., Baton Rouge


Great question, Les. There certainly seems to be a lot of evidence working in favor of that theory. What do you think BingBong; is the SEC plotting for a Bama/UF showdown at the Georgia Dome?

-bingbongsports

Today's Burner has been Postponed due to Lack of Hustle...

...deal with it.

I hope everyone got the Heavyweights reference. If you didn't, then seriously, what have you been doing with your life? Anyway, this week's Burner has been pushed back until tomorrow when all our contributors can participate. The good news is you all have one more day to get in your emails for this week's topic. Remember to send them on in to bingbongsports@gmail.com.

-bingbong management

Lugie's List 11/10: UH UH PLAYOFFS?!

A few teams in the NFL crapped the bed Sunday and really hurt their chance at making the playoffs. Still a ton of football to be played but…

1. See my point last week about the Packers and Giants beating up on bad teams to start the year. Let's start with the Packers who blew an 11 point 4th quarter lead to the 0-7 Josh Freeman led Tampa Bay Buccaneers. (re-reading last sentence… really?... REALLY?!) Anyone still in a survivor leagues or placing a 3-team teasers Sunday collectively vomited after Freeman threw the go-ahead touchdown pass. To boot, the Alanis Morrissette moment of the week has to be the Bucs wearing the jerseys worn during their NFL-record 26 game losing streak from 1976-1977. The life equivalent would be me putting on my old corduroy pants and over-sized orange Abercrombie sweater and going back to high school to date the prom queen (18 years of age for the purposes of this hypothetical).

2. On a related note, Dave Silverstein, BingBongSports writer, producer and head of the pornography division has neither been seen nor heard from after the Aaron Rodgers pick 6 that ended the game Sunday. If you know where he is please call 1-800-FAVRE.

3. The next team on the chopping block – The New York Football Giants losing their fourth straight game. As well as their defense played the for the first 58 minutes, the Giants couldn't get a stop when it mattered. Rivers picked them apart over the middle during that last minute drive, sending the Giants into a free fall going into the bye week. With games still left against the Falcons, Broncos, Cowboys, Eagles and Vikings, things do not look good in Giant-land.

4. Oh Mr. Matt Leinart. It seems like it was just yesterday when you were getting boy band ass at USC, being drafted as the franchise QB of the Arizona Cardinals and sharing a hot tub on draft night with Cameron Diaz, Lindsey Lohan, Kobe Bryant and the Dali Lama (who you kicking out of your hot tub? And I'm not suprised how easy it was to find a picture of Leinart in a hot tub). After watching his 0-1, 1 INT line Sunday subsequently causing the Cardinals to bring back Kurt Warner who threw for a measly 5 TDs, I couldn’t help but reflect on how far Leinart has fallen from being the man.

5. Impressive win for Alabama Sunday over LSU. I know they were at home, but they came back in that game against a tough LSU defense, and by the end I was finally convinced they are worthy of top team status with Florida.

6. Congrats to reader Jimmy Shilladango from Jacksonville, Florida for winning the “How long ‘til Gilbert Arenas creates a controversy by disagreeing with a proven veteran coach yet again” Office Pool. November 8th if you are scoring at home.

7. Betting Trend: The Washington Redskins and New York Knicks are a lock to lose every first half line (Reason: Vegas can’t set the first half line bigger than half the game line). Then at halftime, both teams are a lock to cover the second halftime line (Reason: the betting community has so little faith in these two teams to not just lay down and die after being down big at the half that the line is never set correctly). My motto has always been - if your team is going to suck for an entire season, why not profit?

8. I hate to say it but if I have to hear Jay-Z perform Empire State of Mind one more time at a Yankee event, I’m going to lose my mind. A modern day anthem for New York City has been so overplayed in the last 2 weeks that it is entering Soldier Boy territory of annoyingness. Shawn Corey Carter, hate to break to you buddy but you did not make the Yankee hat famous and you do not actually play for the New York Yankees. Why are you riding on a float down Broadway?

9a. Congrats to Noah Gold (so sexy) on being able to legally chase ambulances for a living! MBN to have a career as I try to make it as a blogger. And I hate to burst your nerd-bubble, but the ‘loser of the week’ award goes to me. A) Halo is cooler than going to any club/lounge in the Meat Packing District and B) Did you watch Sister Act during two different showings on TNT Saturday night? Didn’t think so.

9b. And you thought I’d go the entire column without linking the article title - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qwq7BYOnDrM

10. Sunday Night TV Ratings: Dexter: A-; Californication: B+; Curb B+; Bored to Death C-, Season: D+ (ok, it grew on me a little the last two weeks – enough to get me to watch the beginning of Season 2)

-Steve Lugerner

A Weeklong Glass Case of Emotion

Been getting (fake) emails up the yin yang from disgruntled BingBong enthusiasts wondering where my intelligent, sarcastic, handsome articles have been over the past week or so. Well, I am here to tell you I am back, and to give you a taste of what my life has been like the past week.

Let me preface this by saying that, by this point in the year, rumors among the recent law school graduates (read: nerds) were that the bar results for New York and New Jersey would be coming any day.

Monday 11/2

I break my own cardinal rule and hate myself for it. Brad (who was celebrating his 27th birthday) and Tino were planning on going out to a bar in Madison to watch Game 5 of Yankees-Phillies. Those that know me know my thoughts on going out for big sporting events: I don't heart it. My home-road splits would make Bill James have a stroke.

But, it was my buddy's birthday and the Yankees did have a 3-1 lead. This difference legitimately played a role in my choice to go out that night. Had it been 2-2 or had the Yankees been facing elimination, there's a 99% chance I would've gone straight home.

As it turns out, AJ Burnett pooped himself on three days rest (a move which I did not agree with but can't fault Girardi for going for it). And Tino, Brad, and I decided to go back to the apartment in the 5th inning. And the Yankees outscored the Phillies after we made that move. Coincidence? Please.

No bar results yet.

Wednesday 11/4

If my life was a golf tournament, this was "moving day." The day at work was tense. That day, on the New York Bar website, a note was posted that New York bar results would be released the next morning. Simply reading this message made my heart pound. Not only that, the New Jersey Bar website stated that its results would be released Monday 11/9 at 4pm. So there it is. Oh and one other thing. There was a Game 6 of the World Series going on in the Bronx.

Once again, I break my own rule and meet up with Brad, Tino, and Jeff at the Famished Frog in Morristown. The place is packed with Yankee fans. The Bud Lights are going down like water. Hideki Matsui, a player I've probably castigated more than any other this season, became unconscious and carried the Yankees. While all this was going on, as much as I was enjoying the march toward #27, my mind was racing. My summer of hell was going to culminate in a mere 10 hours. I didn't make mention of this during the game because it was neither the time nor the place. But, needless to say, I was able to watch a lot of the post-game because I was unable to sleep.

Thursday 11/5

Log into my computer. Click on Internet Explorer. No results. Refresh. No results. Refresh. No results. This would go on for many minutes until I finally was notified of the link to check the results. I was alone in my office. My hands were shaking like Brad Lidge with a three run lead. I slowly typed in my ID number and other relevant contact information. The screen goes completely blank. A message appears. My eyes are darting all over the place looking for any sign of hope. After quickly scanning the page, I read more slowly. And it's GOOOOOOOOOD!

I felt like Tiger sinking a 40 foot eagle chip-in without Steve Williams. I simply put my arms in the air and silently yelled to myself like Jerry and George did when they were offered to do a pilot for NBC. To channel my inner Mike Francesa: this was huu-yuuuge.

Friday 11/6

With a busy weekend on tap, I stay in with a roommate who shall remain nameless (to protect his identity) and played Halo for the first time in about 6 months. For 3 hours. Unrelated note: I'm single.

Saturday 11/7

Met up with a couple friends from RU to celebrate the passage of the New York bar. Eventually, we'd meet up at McCarthy's in Hoboken to celebrate Tino's birthday. Dollar drafts all night is alright by me. The night would culminate by taking a car service home, with a large pepperoni pie in tow. College.

Sunday 11/8

Tino and I head to Giants Stadium to take in the Giants-Chargers game on an unseasonably warm November day that turned into night. We end up sitting in front of an adorable mother who, when the Giants had a 1st and 25 following a penalty, exclaimed, "What is 1 and 25??? Is that even possible???"

Well the game itself was great for the first 59+ minutes. Then Phil Rivers decided he was mad the Giants traded him on draft day in 2004 I guess. Giants head into the bye week sizzling hot riding a 4 game losing streak. Awesome. Oh, and New Jersey results are coming in less than 24 hours.

Monday 11/9

Rumors were flying that the results would come before the 4pm promise to avoid having the site crash from all the traffic at one time. That's all I needed to log onto the site. Check for results. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Nothing.

So, I go on with my day, watching the clock like I was a 5th grader in a late afternoon social studies class. I wish I could've had Alex Mack or Hiro Nakamura to fast forward time to get me to 4pm. Just a brutal wait.

3:57. 3:58. 3:59:01. 3:59:32. 3:59:59. 4:00:01. Refresh. It's up. And...IT'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! It's a sweeeeeeeeeep! This time, I pop out of my chair and pace back and forth, giving double Chris DiMarco fist pumps. I'm pleased my home state for which I have so much pride didn't let me down.

The summer of hell (a.k.a. studying all day, never getting on the golf course) all of a sudden became worth it. My era of studying for exams came and went. I can be a real person again. I'm not sure whether that is actually something to celebrate or not.

Anyway, there's my week. A 27th championship for the New York Yankees. A Friday night staying in playing video games. An actual social night out on Saturday. A beautiful night at Giants Stadium sullied by a last minute 1 point loss. And two big clicks of the "Refresh" icon.

It feels good to be back. Trust me...the battle between GG and The OC will be waged soon.